"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."

"When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves."

"Masochism is a valuable job skill."

"It's not living alone if you keep a rifle under the bed."

"The most boring thing in the entire world is nudity. The second most boring thing is honesty."

"People are all over the world telling their one dramatic story and how their life has turned into getting over this one event. Now their lives are more about the past than their future."

"The consciousness of self is the greatest hindrance to the proper execution of all physical action. There is no fixed teaching. All I can provide is an appropriate medicine for a particular ailment."

"Berlin is the testicle of the West. When I want the West to scream, I squeeze on Berlin."

"Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday."

"Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do."

"While you're saving your face, you're losing your ass."

"He that can have patience can have what he will."